With the Oscars just around the corner, I know you're waiting with bated breath to read my Oscar predictions... but really, isn't a dog in a tuxedo way more fun? Especially when the dog is wearing a LEONARDO DICAPRIO-INSPIRED TUXEDO. For real. 
Swag is one of the greatest things ever. Now that I'm a fancy worker, I get to go to conferences, and I'm always on the lookout for which booths are giving away the best stuff. Unfortunately, most arts organizations aren't selling "products," they're selling shows, so the most likely swag you'll see at a presenters or theaters conference is a DVD or CD of some wacky kids' show or magician or Celtic crossover band. At the last conference I attended, I managed to pick up a couple pens and a sticky note pad, but nothing else cool. I think that drug companies give the best swag. There always seem to be mousepads and mugs and pens and hats, and all sorts of other things. My mom and dad used to bring home tons of stuff like that, and it was all rad.
I am taking a fitness class - cardio dance and pilates, specifically. What a joy. It's me, a few other "young ladies," some very overweight middle-aged ladies, some spry but slow old ladies, and one guy. I don't know his name, but I call him Tom. I shake my groove thang twice a week in a school gymnasium, and I love it. You have never seen so many grapevines in one place (except for at mid-Michigan weddings, but then, there's less spandex).
UPDATE - I achieved 78% accuracy. Not great for a pregnancy test, but pretty good for Oscar predictions. If you factor in my runners-up, I had 88% accuracy. Wheeee!
I have been wanting to see Juno, mostly to find out for myself if all the rave reviews I've heard are true - at least, true to me. Everyone I know who's seen it keeps going on and on about the dialogue, how sharp and spot-on it is, and I'm here to tell you that... for the most part, it is. I think that at times, it was a little contrived. Yes, Juno is a tough little cookie, and yes, her rapid-fire speech and all the dialogue throughout the movie are both great. But sometimes I thought "People don't really talk like that." Kids don't say "wizard" when they mean "cool." And because of this, I didn't fully immerse myself in the movie. There were things I just couldn't get over. Nonetheless, it was a great movie. I never looked at my watch during the whole thing, which is a rarity for me. And the cast was great. I was really rooting for Jennifer Garner, who hasn't gotten a lot of mention, but she was terrific.
If you're not watching American Gladiators, you kind of suck. This show is awesome. Some of the competitors are weenies, but some of them are FIERCE.
Oh yes, I'm getting married soon, but did you know that I'm also a maid of honor in a wedding in October? Wheeee! I love being a bridesmaid, and this wedding is extra fun - all of the cool things about planning a wedding, since now I'm "in the know," but none of the pressure, since it's not my wedding. Thanks, EJ! So I went with EJ and Mom of EJ to a bridal show this afternoon, to watch a fashion show and check out some vendors. Some stuff was cool - good photographers, a delicious bite of lemon cake, lovely gowns on display... but then there were the doves. Yes, dove release is still a possibility at your wedding, but the latest and greatest trend is lace doves, with some extra wispy feathers that "complement the lace on a bride's dress." And sure enough, there were lace doves on display at the bridal show - except they were wild-eyed and insane. EJ said they looked rabid. 
I've been thinking about friendship bracelets a lot lately. I remember that I used to wear about a gazillion at a time, especially when I was in elementary school. But I think I should start making them again. I don't do anything crafty, except for scrapbooking, and that's not something you can take with you on a plane or on a car trip, and you can't give the finished products to friends. Well, I suppose you can, but they can't wear it.
For days, I've been sayin "I need to blog again," but I don't really need to recap Christmas or New Year's, and nothing else is going on that I felt I could craft into a well-spun story. And I was looking back over my blog from months past and thinking, "Damn, I used to be funny... what happened? Where's my joy and inspiration? Why can't I think of anything to write about?"
OK, I realize that all sorts of people are going to be blogging about and commenting on Jamie Lynn Spears' pregnancy. I could have taken the high road and not commented... but where's the fun in that?
OK, Project Runway, you're starting to lose me. I will never fully leave you - much like how I feel about ER, or how my dad feels about the Dallas Cowboys, you will always be my favorite reality show, and I'm not giving up on you... but this crop of designers isn't moving me, and the challenges haven't been that exciting yet, and WHERE ARE THE MODELS!? Every other week, there's some crazy challenge that means the designers have to use other models, or it's a group challenge and we only see half the girls. Of course, maybe it's because the models aren't as good this season, either. Where's the drama? Where are the innovative outfits? Where are the tears? Oh, right, Ricky provides the tears.
I can best sum up this movie by paraphrasing my good buddy ES, with whom I saw this decent film last night: "I felt like I've seen it before." This is not to say that it was bad - on the contrary, we both thought it was quite good. But the story line's the same as it ever was: there's a bad guy, doing some bad stuff, there's a cop, doing some stuff that's not perfect, but not as bad as the stuff the bad guy's doing, and the cop is going to bring the bad guy to justice. Simple as that, right? Going into this movie, you have to think that the bad guy is going to get caught eventually, because even if it's based on a true story, movies like this don't get made where the ending is "good guy sucks, bad guys win." It just doesn't happen (here's where the film buffs tell me I'm wrong and name movies where this happens - go ahead! I'm curious!). Two things I really liked: the countless fine actors who appeared in this movie - you never knew who would be on screen next; the violence - yes, I had to cover my eyes, because sometimes it was really, really bad, but it was completely appropriate for a film about a GANGSTER. Come on, violence haters! It's based on a true story, so roll with it.
I really only have one thing to say about this week's episode of PR: Ginny Barber looks like Kimora Lee Simmons.
I can't even lie and say I saw this because of the Oscar buzz surrounding Amy Adams' performance (although it didn't hurt). No, I saw this movie because I straight up wanted to. The trailers looked precious, I love P-Demps, Amy Adams is adorable and I just wanted to have a feel-good movie experience. So there.
This is one of those movies that I felt obligated to see. Marion Cotillard is receiving HUGE Oscar buzz for her performance as Edith Piaf, French singer and tragic figure, and you know me - if it's got Oscar buzz, I have to see it. But other than that, I wasn't really interested. I don't know a whole lot about Edith Piaf, and what I do know is that the sound of her voice bothers me. Or so I thought. More on that later.
No Country for Old Men had three things going for it: it's gotten some Oscar buzz, Nate wanted to see it, and I could get in free. When these stars align, you know I have to see it. I wasn't disappointed. NCFOM was pretty awesome. It wasn't one of those movies that I left thinking "that movie was awesome (like Capote);" I had to think about it for a little bit. In fact, I'm still thinking about it - in a good way. Because it was that awesome. Let's start with the scenery and cinematography. NCFOM had a Brokeback Mountain feel to it at times - little people and cars in a huge, empty expanse of land. I like that. I also like some of the interesting camera angles chosen for certain shots. The sound is also pretty cool - I think. The big downfall of the theater where I saw this film is that it's right above a super hip cool trendy clothing store, and you can hear the bass of the store's music through the floor and walls of the theater. Nonetheless, I could tell that the soundtrack (and by that I mean the music and the sound effects) is good and perfectly fitting for the film.
Ultimately, this movie belongs to Javier Bardem. He is nothing short of sensational. If I were a high-powered movie reviewer, I would say that he is a "revelation." He completely embodied this role, in a way that I bet haunts him at night. I truly feel that if he is not nominated for an Oscar for this, every Academy voter must have been smoking drugs at the same time.
Oh Project Runway, I am thankful for you. Here's why: Sarah. Jessica. Parker. She never even crossed my mind. You picked the perfect guest judge... although I am VERY skeptical of her Bitten line. Steve and Barry's? Really? The last thing I bought at S&B's was a yellow polo shirt, and it shrank after the first wash. But, it was $5.99. So there. Sarah Jessica Effin' Parker. I love it. I feel like she dialed it down and was more real, less Carrie Bradshaw, for her stint as a judge. Way to go, SJP.
Hi - I (zero) have a brother (that's one).
My brother is close personal friends with Felicity Huffman (that's two).
Felicity is on a hit show with Eva Longoria (that's three).
Eva has recently opened a restaurant with Todd English (four), where a nice young man named Seth is the main man in charge in the kitchen (five).
My bestie is Seth's sister.
My parking structure has a new elevator lobby, and it is very fancy. Not quite as fancy as this picture, but pretty close - the floors appear to be made of marble, in a lovely shade of light brown. Actually, it's just the floors that are fancy. Everything else needs to be finished, like the bare walls and exposed electrical wires and buttons, but the floor is beautiful. But I wonder at its necessity. It's just a parking structure, where hundreds of office workers park every day, but nothing more than that. Is this why my monthly fee went up so much?
First, big props to Blogging Project Runway - they had this awesome photo over on their blog, and I'm borrowing it. Thanks, BPR!
Wheeeee! I am so excited for the premiere of Project Runway season 4. I'm getting ready by wearing my most fashion-forward outfit and telling all my co-workers "you're out." Of course, I have to work tonight, but if I know Bravo like I think I do, I'll be able to watch the instant reply at 11 PM. There aren't too many shows I'm willing to stay up for, but PR is one of them.
On Halloween, I got my palm read. I've always wanted to get my palm read - there was a weird little place where I went to college that would do palm readings and crystal ball gazings, and back in the '90s, it was ten bucks per reading. What a bargain. I love Arkansas. But on Halloween, it was a fun extra part of a concert at work, so I had Dr. Voodoo read my palm. He told me that I'm attracted to assholes. He also told me that I need to be more assertive and stop giving people the benefit of the doubt over and over. He also told me that it was possible that I would probably have one child. Yeah, thanks for the specificity. Good times.
Since I am not a member of the Writers Guild of America, I am not crossing any picket lines to continue writing this blog. I suppose that, in a show of solidarity, I could refuse to write until the Hollywood writers get their due... but that's no fun. Besides, I have stories. Stay tuned.
... is for this rumored pair to be true. Please, Santa, will you bring me an Ashley Olson/Lance Armstrong canoodling in Cannes picture? Puh-LEEEEEZE?
Dear J. Crew,
On Saturday, I took Nate and his two friends out to dinner as part of Nate's Good Times Birthday Weekend. We had delicious Indian food and a righteous time was had by all, and since I was feeling generous, I decided to pay for all the boys. Now, you should know that all these guys fancy themselves to be ninjas. There was much sparring and wrestling and purchasing of training tools earlier in the day, and I like to show that I can hang, at least as far as the witty repartee is concerned, so when they all started thanking me (because they are ninjas with manners) I said "You're welcome... no problem... but I'll be taking it out of your ass later on."
Nate and I have been dog sitting for the past few days. I sort of viewed it as a trial run for when we get our own dog, whenever that fateful day may be.
Allow me to set the scene: I arrived in the elevator vestibule of the parking structure where I park every day, after a long and productive day - meetings, paperwork, numerous phone calls, etc. Ready to go home, yes, but not in a huge yank or anything. I had already pushed the 'down' button for my elevator, and the light had gone out, meaning the elevator was on the ground floor, just getting situated and the doors hadn't opened yet.
I think that bikes are a great alternative to cars for the health-conscious consumer without a lot of money. Let's face it - you don't have to buy gas, or pay car insurance, or take care of those pesky parking tickets, and all the while you stay fit. But last night, on my way home from work in the dark, I saw some bad bikers. 
I read Ella Minnow Pea last week. This is one of those books that I see every time I go to the bookstore and think, Wow, I should really get that. So I did. And it was AWESOME. I loved it.
At a recent work gathering, when fancy drinks and snacks were so generously purchased by my place of business, I decided to branch out from the things I usually would order and try something new. First up: the Pimm's Cup. I've been reading about the Pimm's Cup for years - they're mentioned all the time in one of my favorite book series. I did a little research on Pimm's this morning, so that you too can know what I'm talking about: Pimm's is its own kind of liquor, sort of like Southern Comfort, but Pimm's is gin-based (had I known that in advance, I wouldn't have ordered it - I'm not into gin). Pimm's Cups are traditionally made with Pimm's No. 1 and lemon soda or sometimes ginger ale, and always garnished with a cucumber. That's fun. I'd never seen one on a menu before, so I retracted my offer for a Cosmopolitan and tried the Pimm's instead. And... it was OK. I didn't love it. It was too much like champagne, or ginger ale, and I don't really like those, either, and it also didn't have a lot of flavor. I would have been better served getting that Cosmo, or just a beer.
Next up: mussels. Yes, I had never had a mussel before last night. I tend to not be into shellfish, and I think that it's a waste to try (read: pay for) something that I probably won't like - but this was one of those "get an order and pass it around and share" sort of things, so I tried one. And... I didn't like it, and this was not a surprise. It was the texture, sure, but I also didn't like the flavor.
Today marks the kickoff of the 2007 Breast Cancer 3-Day. I walked in the 3-Day last year - that's my team on Day 1. I'm not walking this year, but my team from last year, The Bodacious Tatas, are walking again, and some of them haven't reached the $2200 minimum, so go give 'em some money!
This movie was pretty good. I'd label it a "psychological thriller," or maybe even just a good ol' drama - Ryan Phillippe and Chris Cooper star as FBI guys, and Chris Cooper has done some bad things and Ryan has to infiltrate the badness and bring Chris down. And that's all I want to tell you about the plot, so I don't give anything away. Of course, it's based on a true story, so you could always find a news story and get the scoop, but I'd rather talk about the movie. Lots of people have talked about how hot Ryan Phillippe is, and yes, he's a good-looking man, but he was actually not just a pretty face in this film. There was acting, decent acting, and I'm glad that Ryan has emerged from the shadow of his more-famous and more-praised ex-wife. As for Chris Cooper - the man is awesome. I've loved him for a long time, and this role was outstanding for him: creepy and a little sinister but highly intelligent and somehow sympathetic. There's been Oscar talk about Chris for this role, but I think the movie will fall off everyone's radar come nomination season. It's OK, Chris - one Oscar's really all anybody needs.
I won't event write the story. I'll just give the grade.
Dear college-age football fans,
Last night I happened upon Victoria Beckham: Coming to America on VH1, and you know what? I totally love Victoria Beckham. She was adorable, and so sweet and really pretty funny. This is a picture of Posh throwing out the first pitch at a Dodgers game - she's completely ridiculous, and look at her high-heeled sneakers, but that's what makes her so cute. My favorite thing she did on the show was go therapeutic shopping - she was feeling down because David and the boys were back in England and she was in L.A. house-hunting, so because she was a little sad and missed them, she went shopping. I love this because this is what millions of women worldwide do when they're a little down - but since she's Posh, she went to super fabulous stores and bought teeny tiny, very expensive denim shorts. She's very accessible and yet MAJOR. I've decided that I'm a Posh fan. I've seen through her glossy veneer to the gawky goofball underneath, and I love her for it.
I'm not really into jumpers. I used to be, when I was 11 or 12, but now, I kind of think they're a copout - not quite a dress, because you have to wear something underneath, but not sweatpants, and yet they're comfy because you don't have constricting waistbands. I think my biggest problem with jumpers is the cute factor. Jumpers are inherently cute - there's usually a floral print, or plaid, or the top underneath has embroidered ladybugs or some such thing. Only kindergarten teachers should wear jumpers, because little kids need cute, bright colors on their teaches.
Is Le Dog an Ann Arbor institution? All I know is it's been around for 35 years and shows no signs of closing - ever. EVER! Don't let the name fool you - yes, Le Dog serves three varieties of hot dogs, but they're best known for their huge variety of soups, which they change every day. Just look at this picture! I went there for lunch yesterday with AJ and JJack. I had New England Clam Chowder, AJ had beer & cheese, and JJack had chicken tortilla; we had a little taste test in our break room. My clam chowder was very good - lots of potatoes and celery and the right amount of clams - and AJ's beer and cheese was pretty good, too, but JJack's chicken tortilla was the winner. It was loaded with tortilla strips, and the creamy chickeny brothiness was yummy.
I wonder how long it would take me to run 100 meters. If the guy in the fron of this picture just broke the world record at 9.76 seconds... you'd probably have to multiply that by at least three... and then figure in some kind of ratio based on the size of my tatas... I'm guessing 40 seconds, from start to wheezing finish.
I watched Tim Gunn's Guide To Style last night, and I think it may have changed my life. I have already begun mentally going through my closet and sorting everything into four piles: keepers, menders, throwaways and giveaways. I'm going to start with - wait for it - PAGEANT DRESSES. I've kept them thinking that someday I would sell them, or keep them forever for dress-up clothes, if I ever have a little girl (or a fabulous little boy), but really, they're out of style and they just take up space in my closet. Bye-bye, pageant dresses! I'm also going to take this "mender" category seriously. I have clothes that might be nice, particularly pants, but they're just too long. I should give my seamstress acquaintance a call.
This here is my annual post bitching about the return of the university students. Jjack and I went out for lunch today, and we had to skirt around scores of college kids roaming the streets. I love my town from May to late August, when the kids are away, and I love my town from October-April, when I'm used to them being here, but I don't love my town in early September, when the gutters are filled with red Solo cups, debris left over from nightly beer pong, and the sidewalks teem with girls in big designer sunglasses and Soffe shorts and boys in white caps.
I just got back from singing at a Catholic wedding, and let me tell you, those Catholics are nutty! After singing the whole service, I had to get up and try to do a rousing rendition of Schubert's Ave Maria - after I'd already sung about 43 songs! Why does the hardest song have to come at the end? 
My friend Graham just stopped by! I haven't seen him since last summer. And he reads my blog, so I told him I'd give him a shout-out. Unfortunately, I don't have any pictures of him, so I had to put up a picture of graham crackers - like he's never been called "Graham Cracker" before. Sorry, friend.
